Drottkvaet

The Knowne Worlde Bardic List is doing drottkvaets this month, a scandinavian poetic form that lends itself well to the telling of epics. I think I have kept to the spirit of the concept.


A Modern Saga

On electronic pathways,
The internet highway,
Bright souls go surfing
Seeking for knowledge,
Finding companions
With like-minded interests,
Alliances forming,
Bulletin boards joining
Pooled wisdom sharing,
Through long night’s computing.

But lurking in secret,
Haunting the websites,
Are thrice-cursed spammers,
Blood-sucking parasites,
Dishonestly joining,
Wasting good bandwidth,
On boards interfering,
Cheap Viagra pushing
Pitching lame chat sites,
Porn unsolicited.
Oh, what can be done
To banish these scammers,
Protect our good websites
From unwanted spammers?

In the Shire of Owl’s Nest,
Meridies’ jewel,
Medieval knights playing,
Scadians together,
Each evening relating,
Our BBS using.
But the spammers attack,
Our patience abusing,
Our website invading,
Our tempers enraging,
Who will stand for us,
These twerps ejecting?
Comes Asbrand of Norway,
With graying locks flowing,
Scadian long-standing,
Our BBS owning,
Controlling the pathways,
Owls Nest web minister,
Wielding strong weapon
‘Gainst spammers sinister.
The moment they log on
He swings his spam hammer,
Sends spammers winging,
Their doom he is bringing,
Thus blocking their access,
They’re banished to darkness,
No spammer endures
The doom hammer’s singing.
To online oblivion
These jerks are sent packing,
For their rudeness despised,
And their courtesy lacking.

Now Owl’s Nest rests easy
In online communion,
Sure our web minister
Is guarding our union,
Like Asgardian warrior
On Bifrost Bridge standing.
And when spammers show up,
Hard blows he is landing.
So what if he armors up
On Tuesday nights rarely,
Blowing off fighter practice
For easy chair’s comfort.
For he battles nightly
The scum of the internet
Swinging his mighty
Spamhammer of Doom.