Sirona's Shoulder Song

I feel like a beauty queen
In my home made shoulder sling.
Getting hurt has never been so sexy.
I swung my long sword round about
Until I threw my shoulder out.
Its enough to make a nun have apoplexy.
But now I’m settled in my chair
With a sash from here to there,
While my man waits on my every need.
Yeah, my shoulder is a bust,
But I am still Miss cut and Thrust.
Excelsior! Yes, I’m a queen indeed.

Armored up with sword and helm,
Confident I’d overwhelm,
I walked out in my best gear feeling pretty.
I went out to strut my stuff,
And tore up my rotator cuff.
The pain is really something else that would rhyme here.
But now I’m settled on my throne.
The attention’s all for me alone.
My fans stand round me now with mouths agape.
My fellow says, “Hey, I’ll take care of ya”
Trade my helmet for a tiara.
That’s more like it. Boy, peel me another grape!