OwlsNestBard

Name:
Location: Shire of Trisel, Trimaris

I am in my late forties, a proud husband, father, and a bard. I am a book pedlar by trade and a bookman by vocation. I am a romantic, a realist, and a Believer. I like a good joke, and a bad one even better. I admire all ladies for the innate beauty that is in each one, but my heart is sworn to the fair and gentle Lady Lorelei, who has consented to share my life and my name.

Monday, October 08, 2007

Randalin's Prize

Attend ye gentles, one and all.
Come ye fencers at my call.
Follow to the rapier field
For Lady Randalin.
Our noble Crown’s anointed her
Into the Argent Rapier.
Today the Lady fights her prize
To be inducted in.

The honor of the Lady’s known.
Her prize, she now claims for her own.
And she’s prepared to meet with steel
All comers on the field.
Let sword and dagger, buckler ring.
Listen to her rapier sing.
When the Lady draws her blade
Her honor is her shield.

The masters of the Fencer’s art
Well understand her warrior’s heart.
She fights today to celebrate
Her bounty from the crown.
So follow me and bring your best.
Put the Lady to the test.
Draw steel with Lady Randalin
For glory and renown.

Attend ye gentles, one and all.
Come ye fencers at my call.
Follow to the rapier field
For Lady Randalin.
Our noble Crown’s anointed her
Into the Argent Rapier.
Today the Lady fights her prize
To be inducted in.

Friday, October 05, 2007

Period Swimming On Saturday Night

I've travelled the world and seen many a sight;
Known things that would make a lion take fright.
But nothing has left me so shaken and white
As period swimming on Saturday night.

You might think at first I would be filled with glee.
There were no swim suits in the twelfth century.
The prospects sound good for lots of nudity.
But the swimmers are not the ones you'd want to see.

I'd heard sounds of partying over that way,
So I thought I would go there and join in the play.
But the bodies that I observed there on display
Drove from me any desire to stay.

Such an expanse of flesh I never have seen:
Jello-like masses of meat most obscene,
With unrecognizable pink bits between,
The sight of which turned my stomach quite green.

I do not object to beholding the nude.
I have a live and let live attitude.
But being subjected to such sights is rude,
Depressing and aesthetically crude.

Though we try to practice our medieval ways,
Happy am I if this in the past stays.
For given a choice I would avert my gaze
From period swimming for all of my days.